Geoffrey Palmer was my dad and Wendy Craig was my mum. Nicholas Lyndhurst was my kid brother. Years went by and nothing much happened. Then I had a one night stand with Janine Butcher. And now I have to choose between Audrey Roberts and Rula Lenska.

Scene one: Jack and Ronnie’s flat. Ronnie wakes up and looks out of the window. Kat is pushing her baby in a pram. Ronnie’s baby is in his cot. He looks up and gurgles. Ronnie turns to Jack, who is still sleeping, and yawns. Ronnie: I’ve just had the most terrible dream.